This is a very simple game.

So here's the thing about baseball in April. Although it is early, and there are forty-'leven more games to play (I'll have to get out the Ouija board and ask my grandma what number that word represents, though I'm certain it's way closer to 151 than 51), all the games count, and if a team screws around long enough it won't be able to win more than, say, 83, no matter what.

No matter the month, it's hard for a team to win without hitting the ball, and thus the Cardinals find themselves with the lowly winning percentage of .412. Oh that it were the team batting average instead, but except for some key hits that miraculous October, they haven't hit the ball in a long, long time. LaRussa says they're unprepared. I say that professional baseball players pretty much ought to be able to handle that.

I'm not a one dimensional fan. I appreciate good defense as much as anyone who grew up watching Whitey Herzog's teams, but saving runs is only part of the equation. You still can't win with 0 runs. And with some of these pitchers, you may not win with 5. So, hit the ball, win my heart forever and steal a base, and then hit the ball again. That's Jason Marquis on the mound, not Cy Young or Daisuke Matsuzaka: what are you waiting for? Have you not been playing this game since you were 5?

Well, according to hometown columnist Bernie Miklasz in today's paper, the mighty Pujols is waiting for divine intervention:

"And just because I'm going through what I'm going through now, I won't change my approach. I'm going to keep working my tail off and wait until God tells me that this is the moment when it explodes and never stops."

Preferably before the end of April.