That's the title of this week's Life of Reilly, the SI column in which Rick Reilly gives his suggestions for commemorating home run 756, "a dishonest moment produced by a man who has denied using performance enhancers despite a silo of evidence to the contrary."
A few of my favorites:
- *Get Bonds's autograph at the ballpark--on the bottom of an affidavit which reads, I set this record with the help of performance-enhancing drugs. I am a very large jerk for doing so.
- *Call the Hall of Fame and ask which cap will appear on Bonds's head in his Cooperstown exhibit--the size 7, the size 7 1/2, or the size 8?
- *If you're watching TV, flip to something more plausible, like MacGyver.
- *Send rabbits' feet, four-leaf clovers, and two-headed pennies to Alex Rodriguez and Ken Griffey Jr., letting them know that you're pulling for them to pass Bonds like he's a hitchhiker in an orange jumpsuit.
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