I bet it was that damn McDonald's coffee woman

While I had made my peace, more or less, with the whole surgery business today, I can't say I was looking forward to it. I was, however, looking forward to those lovely hot blankets that the nurses have always been so quick to offer to combat the overly air-conditioned air. I'm sure there are medical reasons not to let your patients develop hypothermia on the ward, but that toasty cotton sure does feel good, too.

"That's the best part about the hospital," I say to the approaching nurse, and suddenly, her face is apologetic.

"Now what?" I ask.

And she explains that someone was apparently, or at least supposedly, burned (with a blanket?? how sensitive can skin be?), and now they can't turn the warmers up high enough. Instead, she'd be more than happy to compensate by plugging a hose into my gown and blowing hot air up my butt. How cozy. She commiserates, admitting her preference for making her patients comfortable with layers, but the days of old fashioned comfort, let alone warm feet, are apparently gone. It's lukewarm blankets or a vacuum-cleaner on reverse, but nothing I really wanted.

I should have taken it as a sign.